The
Tantric art of Yoni Massage
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In Tantra,
the vagina is a sacred part of the female body. The word
for vagina in Sanskrit is Yoni,
which means "sacred space" or "sacred temple." It
is to be treated with respect and great care. The Yoni
massage is a sensuous form of intimacy that builds trust
between partners and brings them closer together emotionally
and spiritually.
A
person of either sex can perform Yoni massage on a woman,
but, for
the purpose of simplifying instruction, the receiver will
be referred to here as "the woman" and the giver
will be referred to as "the man."
Although the
Yoni massage can be extremely stimulating, the purpose
is not to bring the woman to orgasm. Rather, it is to relax
both the giver and receiver and to bring emotions to the
surface. Unlike modern sexual activity, there is no pressure
to achieve climax. Both partners can focus entirely on
relaxation without trying to reach a goal.
To prepare
for the massage, the bladder of the receiver should be
empty and both partners should bathe. Bathing together
is preferred as it is relaxing and gets both parties in
a romantic mood. It also helps if the woman's genital area
has little or no hair because it makes for closer skin
contact. Make sure the atmosphere encourages relaxation
by lighting candles, playing soft music and keeping the
room warm. Only perform the massage when you have a good
deal of time and will not be rushed. Ensure that there
is little to no possibility of interruption.
Before beginning
the massage, the partners gaze into each other's eyes while
embracing. This is a type of Tantric foreplay in which
the couple forms an emotional and spiritual bond.
When both parties
are ready for the massage, the woman lies on her back with
one pillow under her head and another under her hips to
elevate her pelvis. She bends her knees and opens her legs
to expose her vagina, or Yoni.
The giver sits
comfortably between the woman's legs with his legs crossed.
Prior to any
physical contact, both partners perform Tantric breathing
exercises to achieve total relaxation of the mind and body.
There are several possible methods, but the gist of all
of them is to breath deeply, slowly and in unison with
each other. This deep breathing should continue throughout
the entire massage.
The massage
begins with other parts of the woman's body to encourage
her to relax. The man gently but firmly massages her legs,
thighs, stomach, breasts and arms before venturing toward
the vagina.
Next, the man
applies a lubricant to the outside on the woman's genitals.
This can be a warm scented oil, which is particularly pleasurable
for Tantric sex as it delights the senses and can be sensuously
poured over the Yoni, or a substance such as K-Y Jelly.
The lubricant should cover the entire outside of the Yoni.
A
Study in Yoni's
Each
step of the massage should be done slowly, gently and for
at least
a few minutes at a time. Again, this massage should not
be rushed. Both partners should continue to focus on each
other's eyes throughout the massage. Any step of the massage
that causes discomfort or pain for the woman should be
skipped. During the massage, the woman may choose to massage
her breasts for further stimulation. Both parties must
remain completely relaxed during the entire process. If
at any time during the massage the woman has an orgasm,
it is her choice whether or not to continue. Many women
find that continuing with the massage produces several
orgasms, each with increasing intensity. In Tantra, this
is called "riding the wave." If the woman wishes
to avoid orgasm, breathing deeply and relaxing as much
as possible can help to at least postpone climax.
With the right
hand (the right hand is used to balance the polarity of
Tantra), the man massages the outer lips of the woman's
genitals, commonly known as the mound. With his thumb and
index finger, the man gently squeezes each lip of the Yoni,
sliding his fingers up and down the entire length of each
lip. Then, he carefully repeats this process with each
inner lip of the vagina. He varies the pressure and speed
of his touch according to his partner's preferences.
He then gently
strokes the woman's clitoris in a circular motion, clockwise
and counter-clockwise. Next, he squeezes the clitoris between
his thumb and index finger.
Then,
the man inserts his middle finger into the Yoni. Much time
is spent
inside the vagina exploring and massaging. Varying the
speed and depth of his finger, the man feels inside the
Yoni up, down and around. With his finger and palm pointing
upward inside his partner's vagina, the man bends his finger
to make contact with the woman's G-spot, known as the "sacred
spot" in Tantra. If his partner wishes, the man can
also insert his ring finger into the vagina. Some women
enjoy the increased pressure of two fingers. Other options
during this step include the man stimulating the woman's
clitoris with his thumb and gently inserting his pinky
into her anus while his middle finger (and possibly ring
finger) remain inside her Yoni.
The massage
continues until the woman decides it is time to stop. The
couple may choose for other sexual activity to follow.
An appropriate choice is the Lingam massage,
the male form of the Yoni massage.
The Yoni Massage
by Cerina X (all rights reserved)
Background Information:
Yoni (pronounced YO-NEE)
is a Sanskrit word for the vagina that is loosely translated
as "Sacred Space" or "Sacred
Temple." Its meaning and use is an alternate perspective
from the Western view of the female genitals (i.e., Pussy,
Cunt, Twat, etc., words which may or may not be complimentary
depending on the intent of their usage). In Tantra, the Yoni
is seen from a perspective of love and respect. This is especially
helpful for men to learn.
The purpose of the Yoni Massage is to create a space
for the woman (the receiver) to relax, and enter a state
of high arousal and experience much pleasure from her Yoni.
Her partner (the giver) experiences the joy of being of service
and witnessing a special moment. The Yoni Massage can also
be used as a form of safer sex (when latex gloves are used)
and is an excellent activity to build trust and intimacy.
Some massage and sex therapists use it to assist women to
break through sexual blocks or trauma.
The goal of the Yoni massage is not orgasm. Orgasm
is often a pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal is
simply to pleasure and massage the Yoni/vagina. From this
perspective both receiver and giver can relax, and not have
to worry about achieving something. When orgasm does occur
it is usually more expanded, more intense and more satisfying.
Orgasm is allowed to happen or not happen. It is also helpful
for the giver to not expect anything in return. Just allow
the receiver to enjoy the massage and to relax into herself
afterwards. Of course, other sexual activity may follow but
it should be entirely the receiver's choice. This perspective
will build greater intimacy and trust, and will greatly expand
your sexual horizons. PREPARATION: Bathing is always helpful
as it relaxes both the receiver and giver. A quiet space
is desirable with pleasing music, candles, pillows, etc.,
or whatever makes the participants relax and feel safe. Allow
yourself enough time and do not hurry through the process.
Go to the bathroom before beginning the massage. The best
results will occur when the bowels and bladder are empty
and you will avoid the unnecessary experience of interrupting
the massage to go to the bathroom. Connect with your partner
by hugging, holding, eye gazing (looking into each other's
eyes for an extended time), or whatever brings you to a place
of safety and relaxation. PROCEDURE: Have the receiver lie
on her back with pillows under her head so she can look down
at her genitals and up at her partner (giver). Place a pillow,
covered with a towel, under her hips. Her legs are to be
spread apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions
under the knees will also help) and her genitals clearly
exposed for the massage. The giver sits cross-legged between
the receivers' legs. The giver may wish to sit on a pillow
or cushion. This position allows full access to the Yoni
and other parts of the body. Before contacting the body,
begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Both giver and receiver
should remember to keep breathing deeply, slowly and with
relaxation during the entire process. The giver will gently
remind the receiver to start breathing again if the receiver
stops or takes shallower breaths. Deep breathing, not hyperventilating,
is very important here.
Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts,
etc., to get the receiver to relax and for the giver to prepare
for touching the Yoni.
Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil or lubricant
on the mound of the Yoni. Pour just enough so that it drips
down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni. (Several
excellent sexual lubricants are available for this. Many
lingerie shops, sex toy shops, sex magazines, etc., offer
these safe lubricants. My favourite is Yoni Play from Looking
Good Enterprises.)
CAVEAT - Do not mix oil-based products with latex.
Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of
the Yoni. Spend some time here and do not rush. Relax and
enjoy giving the massage. Gently squeeze the outer lip between
the thumb and index finger, and slide up and down the entire
length of each lip. Do the same thing to the inner lips of
the Yoni/vagina. Take your time.
The receiver can massage her own breasts or may just
relax and continue breathing deeply. It is helpful for giver
and receiver to look into each other's eyes as much as possible.
The receiver can tell the giver if the pressure, speed, depth,
etc., needs to be increased or decreased. Limit your speaking
and focus on the pleasurable sensations. (It is my experience
that too much talking gets one out of their feelings and
diminishes the effects.)
Gently stroke the clitoris with clockwise and counter-clockwise
circles. Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers.
Do this as a massage and not to get the receiver off. The
receiver will undoubtedly become very aroused but continue
to encourage her to just relax and breathe.
Slowly and with great care,
insert the middle finger of your right hand into the Yoni
(there is a reason
for using
the right hand as opposed to the left. It has to do with
polarity in Tantra). Very gently explore and massage the
inside of the Yoni/ vagina with this finger. Take your time,
be gentle, and feel up, down and sideways. Vary the depth,
speed and pressure. Remember, this is a massage and you're
nurturing and relaxing the Yoni. With your palm facing up,
and the middle finger inside the Yoni, move the middle finger
in a "come here" gesture or crook back towards
the palm. You will contact a spongy area of tissue just under
the pubic bone, behind the clitoris. This is the G-spot or
in Tantra, the sacred spot (there are many excellent books
that go into detail about this area). Your partner may feel
as if they have to urinate or it may be painful or pleasurable.
Again vary the pressure, speed and pattern of movement. You
can move side to side, back and forth, or in circles with
your middle finger. You can also insert the finger that's
between your middle finger and pinky. Check with your partner
first before sticking two fingers into them. Most women should
have no problem and will enjoy the increased stimulation
from two fingers. Take your time and be very gentle. You
may use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris
as well. An option to try if the receiver wants it is to
insert the pinky of the right hand into her anus. Ask her
first and do not insert your pinky into her Yoni/vagina after
it has been in her anus. Use lubrication and be very gentle.
(In Tantra, it is said that when your pinky is in her anus,
the next finger and middle finger in her Yoni/vagina, and
your thumb on her clitoris, "You are holding one of
the mysteries of the universe in your hand.") So, what
is your left hand doing all this time? You can use it to
massage the breasts, abdomen, or clitoris. If you massage
the clitoris it's usually best to use your thumb in an up
down motion, with the rest of your hand resting on and massaging
the mound. The dual stimulation of right and left hands will
provide much pleasure for the receiver. I do not recommend
using your left hand to touch your own genitals because it
may take your focus off the receiver. Remember, this massage
is for her pleasure and much of the benefit comes from not
only the physical stimulation but the intent as well. Continue
massaging, trying different speeds, pressures and motions.
Keep breathing and looking into each other's eyes. She may
have powerful emotions come up and may cry. Just keep breathing
and be gentle. Many women have been sexually abused and need
to be healed. A giving, loving and patient partner can be
of great value to her.
If she has an orgasm, keep
her breathing, and continue massaging if she wants. More
orgasms may occur, each
gaining
in intensity. In Tantra this is called "riding the wave." Many
women can learn how to be multi-orgasmic with the Yoni Massage
and a very patient partner.
Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Very slowly,
gently, and with respect, remove your hands. Allow her to
just lay there and enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage.
Cuddling or holding is very soothing as well. As you learn
to master the Yoni Massage your sex life will be greatly
enriched and you will learn a great deal about feminine sexuality.
There is a similar massage
for men called the Lingam Massage. Lingam is a Sanskrit word
for the penis that
means, "Wand
of Light."
Cerina
